Laughter For Three
The three short stories that you are about to read are true. They really happened to me along with a little help from an out of control lawn mower, a can of worms, and a two-year-old sister, who wouldn’t keep her clothes on. I hope you will enjoy them!
The Rogue Lawn Mower
When I was around the age of twelve or thirteen, Dad bought a used riding lawn mower. It certainly did not look like the mowers of today. I begged Dad to teach me to drive the mower.
The conversation went something like this, ” Dad, I really want to learn how to drive the lawn mower. Please, I will listen and do everything you tell me to do. Please, please, please. I’ll be careful, I promise.” Dad looked at me shook his head and answered, ” No.”
“But Dad, I can mow the grass when you are at work then, you can just rest when you come home! Oh, Please, Please, Please!” Dad grinned his smile like fathers do and when I saw the twinkle in his eye I knew I had him. He looked at me straight in the eyes and said, “Okay, but you have to do everything I tell you!
” Mom looked at Dad and said, ” Lee, I don’t know, about this! Do you really think she is ready?” Dad smiled again and told me to get on the mower. He looked at Mom and said, ” Let’s see what she can do.”
I was so excited as I jumped on the seat and waited for Dad to start the mower. I held on to the handle- bar as he started it. ( Yes, I did say, handle- bar.)
Then, all of a sudden, the bar became a little stuck, or maybe I turned it too hard. All I remember is the mower took off in a circle. It kept going around and around and around. Dad kept shouting to straighten out the bar. Well, I turned it and then I don’t know what happened. The rogue mower went straight towards Mom!
She started running and the mower chased after her. Then I turned the handle a little bit, and the rogue mower started to go around, and around, and around again. Finally, the mower stopped, I got off a little dizzy and looked at Mom. She was catching her breath and said, “Cindy, you looked just like Lucy!” ( from the I Love Lucy Show) Then, I looked at Dad. He didn’t say a word. His eyes said it all. My mowing days were over!
A Can of Worms
When I was about nine years old, Dad asked if I wanted to go fishing with him. Of course, I said, “Yes!” I had been to the river with my aunt and uncle but I had never gone fishing. Dad got an empty can and off we went to dig up icky, really disgusting looking worms. I just watched as Dad dug and filled the can. All I could think was, “Yuk.”
Mom packed a few snacks and we were off on an adventure that I will never forget. But first, I must tell you that as a child, I liked to talk and sing, and ask questions; lots of questions. Poor Dad did not know what he was getting himself into.
We arrived at the river and got out our little canvas seats, our fishing poles, our snacks, a lantern, and the icky can of worms. Dad put a worm on his hook, as I held my hands over my eyes and prayed he would not ask me to even pick up on of those slithering little things. I just started my silent prayer, when I heard Dad say, “Put your worm on your hook.” I looked at Dad and begged him to put the worm on the hook for me. I remember coming up with all kind of excuses, ” I can’t touch it, it’s icky. Dad, my fingers will get slimy. Dad what if he bites me?” I could tell that Dad was losing his patience so I held the worm by my fingertips and closed my eyes. Dad said, ” Just give me the worm!” (Thought to self, “Closing of the eyes, just might work for other dreaded tasks.”)
After the worm incident, Dad taught me the step by step of how to cast a line. It wasn’t too difficult. I only got the hook caught in a little bush, around a rock, on a branch, and on the canvas seat. Not too bad for a beginner.
Finally, both poles were in the water and Dad and I relaxed. I was quiet for a while until…… ” Dad, what’s that sound?” Dad replied, “You know the sound of crickets.” I continued, “It’s sounds like a million of them! Where are they hiding?” Dad just looked at me and said, “Everywhere.” ” Dad, did you hear that? “What is that?” Dad once again looked at me and said, ” It is probably a little animal running through the bushes.” I replied, ” What kind of animal do you think it is? It doesn’t sound little to me!” Dad looked at me and said, ” Cindy, you have to be quiet. You’ll scare the fish away.”
I looked at Dad, ready to ask another question when all of a sudden my pole started bobbing up and down. Dad told me to reel it in and I tried, I really tried. My feet kept moving from right to left and left to right. In my excitement, I accidentally knocked over the can of icky worms! My line was coming closer and closer, I pulled the line up a little bit more and screamed, ” It’s a snake!, It’s a snake!”
At that very moment, I left go of the pole and backed up closer to Dad. I looked up at Dad and wondered what he was thinking. I looked out over the river and wondered how the eel could possibly swim and pull the rod behind him.
As we packed Dad did not say much, but I could tell what he was thinking. On the way home, Dad said, ” Cindy, I don’t think fishing is the right thing for you.” I looked at my Dad and said, ” I think you are right.” I told him I was sorry, then Dad smiled his special smile and I knew this was one story that would be told over and over again.
Little Sister, Keep Your Clothes On!
It was nearing the end of school and the weather was warm and beautiful. As my school bus headed up my road and approached my house, I could hear laughter. The closer we got the more laughter I heard.
Since I was sitting at the back of the bus, I had no clue what was going on until the bus stopped and I headed up the aisle. The loudness of the laughter loomed and everyone was standing and pointing at my house.
What was going on? As I walked down the steps and rounded the front of the bus, my heart sank. There, standing in the fenced in play yard, was my two-year-old sister standing stark naked!
I walked as quickly as I could and marched into the house. Mom looked at me and smiled. I looked at her and announced, that I would not be returning to school tomorrow or any other day! She looked at me with a blank stare and asked what was wrong. I said, “Follow me.”
As we approached the play yard Mom could not believe what she saw. ” I just put her out here! How did she get undressed so quickly?” said Mom. I looked at my sister who was giggling. She did not have a care in the world. She was sweet and oh so tiny. Her cute brown hair and beautiful brown eyes always melted my heart. I could not stay mad at her.
That night I said a prayer that my little sister would keep her clothes on. Especially if she was having fun in the play yard.
I decided I would go to school the next day and when the bus came up the road, there was no laughter or pointing. There was just my little sister playing in the yard with Mom fully dressed.
My heartfelt thoughts…………
To my sister, Donna, the little two-year-old that wouldn’t keep her clothes on as a child. I loved you then and I love you, even more, today.